Fool's gold

(242)  Jader mohete tomare bhulechi

Idolizing others, I forgot You;
They have all forsaken me.
To make them smile, to give them pleasure,
I depleted myself.

My false loves came to naught;
Futility was all seen through.
Now, eyes opened, I discern Thee;
Never will I leave You.

Today, all the ignorance of my heart—
Come annihilate it from within.

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One last hurdle

(241)  Tumi amar kata apan

You are my very own;
I did not realize it before.
To me You remained ever near;
Why did I not call?

You were in all my deeds,
In the meter and music of my melodies.
Today, those harp strings still resound;
Back then, I did not hear.

Lord, along my journey,
While in deepest darkness,
Rose those same souvenirs
In mind, time after time.
From self-esteem You'd withdrawn,
Casting me far away.
Why, when finally clasping Your feet,
Do I not hold You in my heart,
When shedding all doubts,
Do I not cherish You in my meditation?

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Perfection

(240)  Tomar alote jhalamala kari

In Your light, I shine;
In Your melody, ever I sing.
Thoughts of You fill my life;
So on Your path I go, dancing.

I drift in the land of dreams,
Where flowers have no thorns.
Laughing, I move at high tide of life,
Where living has no reflux.
In the current of existence, toward You
May I ever rush.

By Your blessing and in life's delight,
Let me go on seeing everyone alive as good.^[1]

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Total surrender

(239)  Esecho tumi esecho

You've appeared, You've appeared.
In the blue yonder, like a peacock,
Yourself You have spread.

By Your tender touch a gloomy life
Has gained new light.
With the jingling of Your ankle bells,
The three worlds^[1] are aroused.
Come closer, stay closer,
Now that You've let Yourself be found.

In me is no devotion, nor any ability;
Ardent prostration is all I know how to do.
Receiving my humble salutation,You make me complete.

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Unintelligible

(238)  Amar katha eta dine

After so long, my story
Has come to Your attention, Lord.
You'd been neglecting me,
Being with Your votaries.

To forget me was easy;
After all, I'm not a devotee.
To earth You dispatched me;
That too was not in Your memory.

Today, at Your whim and by Your grace,
With heart and soul, I cherish Thee.

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Mercy

(237)  Eso eso tumi eso eso

Come, Lord, come
With Your bright lamplight,
Removing my every defect,
Wedding to dust all my pride.

If You wish, what on this earth cannot be?
If You conceive, a river flows in the desert.
Be seated, Lord, be seated
In the parched wilderness of my heart.

If You wish, in stone a lotus blooms;
If You conceive, in darkness light streams.
Smile, Lord, smile;
Make me forget all my troubles.

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So I go to Thee

(236)  Ghumaghore dekhechi go

Deep in sleep did I descry
That You consider my plight.
Many ages have slipped away,
Yet no one knew my pain.

Days come, and days go;
My tears, they flow and flow.
But now I know that You be
Full of compassion for me.

So I go in meditation and cognition
Toward You, oh my Supreme One.

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Dire straits

(235)  Bhramar kache ese amar caripashe

A bumblebee came near, moving around me;
Whispering the news, what he'd viewed.
You remain seated, waiting for my invitation;
Why oh why have I forgotten You?

Any living being, conscious or unconscious,
Can never be neglected by Thee.
Abed and dreaming, asleep or awake,
Lord, You abide with everyone.
We know not how to see; erring, we do not heed.
Though we know it not, we are in dire straits.

Days come and go, never looking back again;
Where do they go, I do not know.
Carried off with those days, where go the pains,
And where go the declarations of love?
Let me hold You in my heart; make me heed You;
You alone remain, let all else be gone.

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Don't let me down

(234)  Tava darashana ashe rayechi pathera pashe

In hope of seeing You, by the path I linger.
Don't let me down, Lord; that's my only prayer.

With warm-sweet smile, exude Your floral fragrance;
Come into my life, rousing new consciousness.

Come stepping rhythmically in the dance that enchants the world;
Flood my mind with nectar of new songs in new notes.

Come with new attire to this dusty earth;
Stand by me in every deed, bestowing grace without reserve.

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Divine thief

(233)  Esecho esecho prabhu esecho

You came, You came, Lord, You came
Exuding lustrous beauty— You sat beside me;
You sat beside me.

With Your footdust, the earth becomes holy;
With Your touch, life brims with delight.
You gazed, You gazed, You gazed
With favor on me— You opened my eyes;
You opened my eyes.

With Your blessing the world gets new life;
With Your beat and tune emerges new psalm.
You seized, You seized, You seized
Covertly my faults and virtues— You took my all;
You took my all.

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My constant companion

(232)  Kache o dure na jana sure

From far and near, in unknown melodies,
Your songs I hear.
In turbulent wind and calm blue sky,
I see Your beauty.

In the rhythm and song of outer world,
None remained with me,
Weeping in pain, in sorrow,
To wipe tears from my eyes.

In darkest night on a lonesome path,
I find You always by my side.

Leaving me alone, all went away;
False love faded into nothingness.
In every adversity You stood by me;
So to You with heart and soul I cling.

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Onward, ever onward

(231)  Andhara nishay amari hiyay

At darkest night into my heart,
Bringing light You came;
And every grain and granule of my thought
Still sways on that divine litter today.

With rise and fall, the stream of life proceeds;
The punctuation marks never impede.
By Your will, the world is filled with rhythm;
In that rhythm, the luster of intellect is ever bright.

When You have come, stay forevermore;
In the remote regions of my heart, emanate Your splendor.

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Footdust

(230)  Narada shona katha amar ei vyatha

Krsna Narada, listen to my words, this pain of mine— It can only be removed by applying a devotee's footdust. In a certain corner of the world, observe secretly— Hidden are such devotees even today. Narada How hard this is, no one wants to give Footdust for my dearest Krsna. Everyone tells me: "I won't consider that; Those are sinful words to my ears." Brother from Vraja, tell me where to go, How to rescue Krsna dearest. For fear of sin, no one wants to offer Footdust at this crucial juncture. Resident of Vraja Great sage, I know not if a devotee am I; I have not heard such news till now. Yet I do not fear sin; I am daring— To cure Krsna, my footdust I will give.

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Tortured for work

(229)  Krsna darashane vyakula parane

People of Vraja To visit Krsna, in eager spirit, With much trouble and much hope, we have come. We would tenderly adorn him with red powder[1] And feed him milk-sweets to his satisfaction. Krsna In many different duties I am engaged; There is no time to accept red powder. Minister, tell that and explain to them That they should return to Vraja. People of Vraja Tortured, tortured, you have tortured us; You poured ashes on our hearts, on all hope therein. With tears flowing, like orphans, We go to Gokul to begin your work.

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